My Legacy

"But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may reside in me. So I take pleasure in weaknesses, insults, catastrophes, persecutions, and in pressures, because of Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

What do I want my life to show? One thing I really want it to show that you CAN adopt a sibling group! I want it to show that your family can survive and THRIVE! I want more kids to find forever families! There's too many kids without families. There's plenty of homes. There's plenty of room.

For that reason I WANT to highlight my personal weaknesses!! I don't want to lie and give false impressions of being super patient, super organized, super *anything*! Because I want people to see that if I can, certainly THEY can!

I don't want anyone to mistakenly think that I had or have enough money, resources, time, talent, patience, diligence, love, peace, energy, or anything else one might imagine is needed...

I don't want anyone thinking I am super spiritual. The truth is God took small hesitant "yeses" and made them bigger and pushed my boundaries and borders further and further and further...

God didn't throw down unlimited resources so we could take them and run... No, as we increased what we said "yes" to and walked through with empty hands he filled them day by day for the tasks and needs of that day. And there were days of walking through thinking the provision would be too late. But it arrived just in time.

I've learned that in the same way that God can stretch our physical resources, he can stretch my character...

He has shown me daily through my IMpatience how to cry out for patience and to get back up and try again with his strength to be more patient the next time...

He has shown me how to let a struggling child in my family vent without coming up with all the answers and fighting back...through my offering hollow answers that meant nothing and letting me see that all blow up...

So that I would learn to cry out to him to meet that need that I could not...

He has shown through through letting me argue back to see that I can't win an argument...but that he can change a heart (even mine).

He has shown me through my depleted energy and exhausted discouragement to rely on him to accomplish the next thing...and the next thing...and the next...

My legacy is not my strength. My legacy is my weakness when it meets with the strength of the God of the Universe.

My mind remembers back to a lesson over 20 years old when I was asked to enter a ministry and I shared with my pastor that I was scared and didn't think I had what it took. His answer? "Good!! This needs someone who knows that and relies on God and will not be tempted to rely on self."

My mom came to visit last week. I hope she doesn't mind my sharing this but she's never been a big fan of chaos (not many are, right?). She spoke a word to me that had more power than she realized. She said, "Your life is peaceful."

How many times in the midst of adjustment and explosion and chaos did I run worship songs through my head phones and beg God for PEACE? Steady peace in my heart, peace in my home, peace in my family, a life of PEACE. So when she spoke I realized...my prayer is being answered!! 

For,“Whoever would love life and see good days must keep their tongue from evil and their lips from deceitful speech. They must turn from evil and do good; they must seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.” ~1 Peter 3:10-12

My legacy is my weakness.